She is the daughter of a king … she becomes a desolate woman. Her position guarantees a lifetime of honor and recognition, but instead she spends most of her life in seclusion and disgrace.
Tamar’s earlier years are characterized by beauty and innocence, which both captivate and torture a certain young man, her half brother, Amnon. “Amnon became so obsessed with his sister Tamar that he made himself ill. She was a virgin, and it seemed impossible for him to do anything to her” (2 Samuel 13:2).
Amnon’s shrewd cousin comes up with a plan that makes the impossible possible.…
“For your ways are in full view of the Lord, and he examines all your paths. The evil deeds of the wicked ensnare them; the cords of their sins hold them fast. For lack of discipline they will die, led astray by their own great folly.”
(Proverbs 5:21–23)
What Is a Victim?
Jonadab counsels Amnon, “Go to bed and pretend to be ill.… When your father comes to see you, say to him, ‘I would like my sister Tamar to come and give me something to eat. Let her prepare the food in my sight so I may watch her and then eat it from her hand’ ” (2 Samuel 13:5). Amnon has no trouble figuring out the rest of the plan.
King David attends to his “sickly” son Amnon and dutifully honors his request to beckon Tamar to his bedside. Tamar prepares cakes and brings them to Amnon, but instead of grabbing hold of the cakes, he grabs hold of Tamar.
“ ‘No, my brother!’ she said to him. ‘Don’t force me! Such a thing should not be done in Israel! Don’t do this wicked thing. What about me? Where could I get rid of my disgrace? And what about you? You would be like one of the wicked fools in Israel. Please speak to the king; he will not keep me from being married to you’ ”
(2 Samuel 13:12–13).
Tamar’s voice of reason goes unheeded, and Amnon, determined to satisfy his fleshly appetite, proceeds to forcibly rape his half sister. “He refused to listen to her, and since he was stronger than she, he raped her” (2 Samuel 13:14). In so doing, Amnon proved himself to be “one of the wicked fools in Israel!”…
“In his arrogance the wicked man hunts down the weak, who are caught in the schemes he devises.”
(Psalm 10:2)
- A victim is a person who experiences adversity, who is powerless to change the situation.
Example: A victim of neglect as a result of alcoholic parents, an unwanted divorce, infidelity, spiritual abuse, suicide, elder abuse, stalking, or sexual harassment.
- Tamar was clearly the victim of Amnon. And as his victim, she experienced all three of the following definitions of a victim:
- A victim is a person who is tricked or duped.
Example: A victim of robbery, identity theft, fraud, kidnapping, cult entrapment, and other dishonest schemes
- A victim is a person who is injured, destroyed, or sacrificed.
Example: A victim of incest, domestic violence, rape, satanic ritual abuse, drunk driver, homicide, natural disaster
- A victim is a person who is subjected to oppression, hardship, or mistreatment.
Example: A victim of any verbal, emotional, sexual, physical, racial, or economic abuse …
“People cry out under a load of oppression; they plead for relief from the arm of the powerful.”
(Job 35:9)
God Sees Your Grief
Question: “Does God even see the grief I carry in my heart as a result of being victimized?”
Answer: Yes, He sees your grief, He takes it seriously, and He acts on it.…
“You, God, see the trouble of the afflicted; you consider their grief and take it in hand. The victims commit themselves to you; you are the helper of the fatherless.”
(Psalm 10:14)