Do You Have Legitimate Boundaries?
“The highway of the upright avoids evil; those who guard their ways preserve their lives.”
(Proverbs 16:17)
You’ve captured the essence of good boundaries well. Here’s a bit more detail on each point:
1. Define Our Individual Separateness and Protect Our Treasures:
Good boundaries help us understand and maintain our own identity, distinguishing our needs, desires, and responsibilities from those of others. They safeguard our potential, unique personality, abilities, and spiritual gifts, ensuring that we can fully utilize and grow these aspects without undue interference or exploitation from others.
2. Enhance and Encourage the Development of Christlike Character:
Boundaries foster environments where respect and mutual understanding can thrive. By clearly communicating what is acceptable and what isn’t, boundaries help nurture relationships that promote growth in Christlike character. This involves respecting each other’s limits and working together in ways that build up and support one another in our spiritual journeys.
3. Prevent Us from Establishing Bad Boundaries:
Good boundaries help us avoid creating overly restrictive or unhealthy barriers that isolate us from meaningful connections. Instead of shutting others out, healthy boundaries ensure we have clear, respectful guidelines that facilitate genuine and productive interactions. This balance is crucial for maintaining both personal integrity and relational depth.
4. Build Walls with Doors:
This metaphor illustrates that boundaries are not meant to be impermeable walls that completely shut others out but are rather structures that allow safe and controlled interactions. They provide protection while still enabling connection, ensuring that relationships are safe and nurturing rather than harmful or invasive.
By establishing and maintaining good boundaries, we create a framework that supports personal growth, respectful relationships, and effective interactions, all while safeguarding our well-being and fostering a Christlike attitude.
Jesus gave them this answer: ‘Very truly I tell you, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does. ... By myself I can do nothing; I judge only as I hear, and my judgment is just, for I seek not to please myself but him who sent me.’”
(John 5:19, 30)